Vignettes of my Gentle FemDom Relationship
It can be hard to come up with gentle femdom ideas on your own, which is why I'm sharing snippets of my own relationship to spark your imagination. From little physical gestures of affection to the total domination over his life, my dearheart always knows that he is wrapped up in my love.
Besides snippets shared of my dearheart husband, I have since also written vignettes with my dear lady that I shall call to your attention:
Mistress
Both relationships are beautiful and unique. I recommend reading both posts.
Without further ado, here are snippets of life with my dearheart:
We greet each other every day with my dearheart presenting his collar to me. He lowers himself beneath me. Then I choose to place the collar comfortably around his neck.
Our relationship and love is a daily choice, and that collar shows that he deserves to be claimed as mine.
When I pass by my dearheart's desk I make sure to kiss his forehead, rub his back, or entangle my fingers in his hair. Only briefly, so as to not distract him or demand his full attention.
He returns the gesture by stopping to give me touches whenever he passes by. When he starts to pull away I hold him fast for a moment more. I'm not done with him yet, and clinging to him tells him that he's wanted and loved.
Only once in several years has my partner needed to be punished. I gave him lashes with leather at his request. Even after he made mistakes he said "You don't make me feel like I need to be punished."
I'd rather empower him than break him down with punishments. He should feel safe to fail.
His smaller acts of service carry us a great deal through the day to day. I need only hold out an item for him to take care of it, whether that entails refilling my water or taking away my dishes to be cleaned.
There are times when I'm accommodating, and times when I'm forceful. Most days I ask my dearheart questions to gauge where he's at.
"Are you up for a walk?" or "Do you want to make dinner?"
I want to know his status so that I can make an informed decision – and whether to override his initial answer or not.
Commands are an infrequent tool I keep to sparing use. I don't want him to feel overtly controlled, I want him to anticipate my needs and serve of his own accord.
That said, a forceful "We're going for a walk now" is always fun to toss into the mix of daily life.
On our walks I take the lead with subtle directional tugs of his hand. Pull to go this way, push to go that way, gesture to let him know that a turn is coming.
There's no need for words with so much practise together. I lead, and he follows.
When my dearheart is afraid of the future, I get to play goad to his ambition. Whether for buying a home we can be happy in, or challenging him to train for a new career, I hold him to a higher standard.
I hold him to my standard of excellence. It scared him, for a time.
At night when it's time to take the collar off for bed, I make sure to tighten it first. That brief constriction is a pleasant sensation that serves as a reminder of my love.
My dearheart needs to be held when things are most rough and overwhelming.
It doesn't happen often, but the vulnerability takes my breath away when I clutch him tight against me.
He's larger than I am, but that doesn't matter as the little spoon. He's still wrapped up in my arms, safe from the ever-present problems of the moment.
Being put into a rope harness is like being wrapped in a tight embrace. My dearheart could always use more time in harness.
Sometimes I'll put him in one for him to sit at his desk. Other times he'll go out and run errands in a harness under his clothes. Other times still, the harness is just one more aspect of play.
My dearheart's hips fit firmly into my grip when I teasingly grab him from behind.
From there it's simple to spin him around and pin him against a wall for kisses and nibbles, his hands caught up in mine above his head.
I'm a strong woman, but I'm unlikely to overpower him. I have to rely on a more mental control. Convincing him to do what I want, or dangling rewards and praise for obedience.
"Tell me you love me and I'll let you touch me."
"You're my good boy, and you're mine."
"Stop struggling and I'll kiss you."
Praise needs to be suffered for: my dearheart needs to strive towards goals, work hard at them, and struggle.
Floating praise is worthless and empty. If it's unearned, it falls flat and feels hollow.
Good praise is specific and relevant. "You did a good job keeping the kitchen clean, it really picks my mood up when I get up in the morning to clean counters."
My dearheart loves to learn my habits and routines. Having expectations makes it easier to anticipate my needs.
Whether it's something regular like having a set time for dinner, or more spontaneous such as sporadic nap times.
He's learned that in the afternoon after my walk, I occasionally want to nap and be cuddled. Now he knows that if I vanish back into the bedroom, it's time to come lay down.
Final Thoughts
Our relationship revolves around not just gentle affection, but the heights of ambition that lead to my control over our finances. Sex and cuddles and soft, pleasant things are only the tip of the iceberg.
I want to prepare my dearheart for anything in the world, and to equip him to handle whatever comes our way. I want to keep him safe and nurtured as best I may.
The large and small gestures alike are there to show my dearheart how much I love him:
Mistress
